Why You Should Loosen Your Grip On Relationships



Last week, we talked about the importance of impact versus recognition. I mentioned a podcast episode by Andy Stanley, one where he talks about becoming a Beyond You leader. The next characteristic of an Invisible Leader goes hand-in-hand with that idea.

Don’t hold too tightly to relationships.

Now, don’t misinterpret what I mean by that. When I say “loosen your grip” on relationships, I don’t mean you shouldn’t invest in the people around you. Don’t be afraid to get to know your team in a meaningful way. However, don’t get so close that you can’t let go.

The thought of your star player leaving the team should definitely make you a little nervous. But it doesn’t have to be the end of the world. You want all of the people on your team to succeed in their calling. And sometimes that means they have to move on to something else.

The way you support team members as they transition out of a role is a direct reflection on the influence you’ll continue to have on them. Will you treat them with equal attention, support, and encouragement as you did when they were excelling on your team? Or will you give them the cold shoulder out of response to them “leaving you in the dust”?

I heard Erwin McManus of Mosaic church speak on this topic a few years ago. He said when people leave your team, they carry your influence with them to the next place. Celebrate, don’t fear those transitions.

Celebrate transitions, don't fear them. Click To Tweet

An important thing to remember in this circumstance is the part you’ve played in their leadership journey. It’s something to be proud of. A relationship to cherish. Because your leadership legacy will not only influence your team member, it will influence the next organization they go to, and the next one after that, and the one to follow.



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